If you are a fellow tweet-aholic such as myself and living in the Jacksonville area, you’ve no doubt been exposed to the antics of @RiversideAsFuck. This guy/girl(?) has it out for fixed gear riders, hipsters, indie kids, haiku, jorts, beards, bloggers, recessionistas and anyone who does anything cool, hip, faddish, or otherwise.

Here’s some examples:

  • Someone called me a poser just b/c I leach onto all this cool stuff other people did 1st, that i had no interest in until they did it. PSSSH
  • Were uniforms issued 4 the bike race?Is that why I saw 8 people ridin fixes w/ mohawks, jorts & old ass shirts w/in 2 minutes of each other?
  • I’m going to start screen printing my homework instead of typing it. Then, even my teachers will know what the fuck is up.
  • Did I mention how cool my beard is? It takes a lot of talent and skill to grow facial hair, you know. so LOOK AT MY FUCKING BEARD!
  • Bet noone went to as many bars as I did last night: shanty,eclipse,burrito gallery,steamworks,square1,TSI,& o’brothers.

Rest assured that if you tweet something, RAF will spin it and make you look like a dickhead. In his/her own words:

“No one like the dude/who enters the room/and shows you your own ass/but fuck it those are the facts”

I don’t know if it’s the same person or not, but there is a Riverside As Fuck? quiz out on facebook as well. It’s supposed to tell you just how Riverside you are but isn’t very accurate. According to RAF’s tweets, I most certainly am but the test says I’m Jax Beach, so WTF?!

I can’t tell if this person is an asshole or just someone with a great sense of humor, but it certainly does make me chuckle sometimes, even when it’s directed at me. I sincerely hope it is the latter because the only thing worse than people who do shit just because it’s the cool thing to do are the people who refuse to do things just because it’s the cool thing to do.

Diablo OUT!